I Adore you.

"Sometimes it takes repetition for such a small saying to sink in and have such greater value and meaning."

That's what i got out of church last night. He said it during worship. I did pay attention the rest of the time. But my mind has been wrapped around the truth of that saying.

I adore you.

Have you ever had that person in your life, that you look at and go, How in the world, can ANYONE not believe in Intelligent design. Its like this person, was made, created, to be in your life. This person was designed and built, for your life. Not matter how large or small of a role, they were created in his image, character traits intelligently designed, for your life!

I adore you.

And yet somehow, something in the back of your head, doesn't feel that this person fits. Somehow, something in your subconscious something drives at you, telling you if this person seems to be to good to be true, then they are.

I adore you.

Through your PAST, your experiences guarantee you that this person will not be the ray of light, will not be that perfect fitting puzzle piece. NO Nonono. You have been let down too many times in the past. Guys and girls it doesn't matter. Friends, best friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, brothers, sisters, acquaintances, and complete strangers. Every single one has let you down.

I adore you.

And so this piece of the puzzle cant be all that its cracked up to be can it? This time spent is all insignificant to whats destined to come. And that's failure. And that's let down. And that's someone who wouldn't dare give half of what you would give for a simple friendship.

I Adore you.

So who then do you trust?

I Adore you.

I gotta say there is only one answer to that. And that is the lord. And that is the bible. We are told that nobody is and ever will be perfect. And yet we try and hold quite a few people in our lives to the standard that they should be. Whether its boyfriend or girlfriends, best friends or siblings, mom or dad. Maybe I'm off and its just me. But i have subconsciously and consciously held certain people in my life to a perfect standard. And that's not fair.

I ADORE you.

Christ was perfect. In every way. The bible is perfect. In every way. God. God is perfect. Beyond every way that i could fathom. I am told to forgive and to love. And that's hard. Its hard to forgive any girl in my life for what my ex has done to me. I do in my own passive way, treat girls as if they are all the same. Because i was hurt by one. Because one girl did somethings to me, and because more than one girl did something to my father, and because multiple girls have done many things to my best of friends, i passively think of them as all the same. How am i supposed to forgive the girls that did these things, if i am blaming even those that didn't? If i am blaming the ones who didn't do a thing. Who wouldn't do a thing.

I ADORE you.

Oh and this little novel isn't just about the girls. Because i have been screwed over from some of my closest guy friends. And the ones i call friends now. I passively take it out on them. I don't trust. I don't believe a word. I don't have any faith in anyone. How am i supposed to forgive those in my past who have screwed me over, if i am blaming those who had nothing to do with that. Who didn't do those things. Who wouldn't do those things.

I ADORE YOU.

Well i guess this is where it starts. At least i hope. I have to admit my faults and problems. I have to admit to you whom i unfairly judge because of what someone you don't even know did to me. I am wrong. Forgive me. Girls, i am sorry. You are not all the same, and you are not all out to screw over a guy. Forgive me for classifying you. Forgive me for going farther then stereotyping you. I am sorry. Brothers, i am sorry. Forgive me for not trusting you. Forgive me for holding you to such a high standard. Forgive me for classifying you.

I ADORE YOU.

Oh lord how i adore you. Oh lord how perfect and amazing you are. Thank you for intelligently designing the people in my life. Thank you for giving some of them the purpose of being in my life. Thank you for slapping my hand when i am wrong. Thank you for gently showing me my faults and the things i need to change. I am trying to forgive. I am trying to love my enemy. Please be patient with me, because i am going to struggle. Please allow those who i have wronged to forgive me, though i don't deserve it. I trust you. I believe you. I have faith in you. I Adore you. Thank you.




Randall's lyrics of the day:


Can you feel your heart beat racing
Can you taste the fear in her sweat?
You've done this wrong, we're too far gone
These sheets tell of regret
I admit that I'm just a fool for you

Here is where we both went wrong

Tonight's your last chance to do exactly what you want to
And this could be my night, this is what makes me feel alive
Makes you feel alive

Here is where we both go wrong
So sign me up and toss this key 'cause for now were living

In this moment that we both ignore the truth
Its all over
I feel your heart against mine
So take a breath and close your eyes

Your lungs have failed and they're both stopped breathing
My heart is dead its way past beating
Something has gone terribly wrong
I'm scared, you're scared, we're scared of this
I never thought we'd make it out alive
I never told you but it's all in your goodbyes

Well look who's dying now slit wrists sleeping with the girl next door
I always knew you were such a sucker for that
It doesn't matter what you say
You never mattered anyway
I never mattered anyway

Don't shake I hate to see you tremble - trembling
You've lost your touch haven't you
And I'm so addicted


Randall's verse of the day :

1 Peter 3:15

15but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;